Here I was getting ready to b*tch about how I only got to see my sweet baby for a grand total of 60 minutes yesterday (not all at once, and 40 of those minutes were feeding) and how I HATE being a working mom, when my life dream was to be a SAHM and I want it so bad!!
And then I read some of my fave IF blogs. One of them discussed how she is reaching/has reached the end of pregnancy being a viable option (or at least with her own genetic material) and in her blog she said, "I WANT THIS SO BADLY, this THIS which= me plus him that it is hard to breathe."
And I had to stop.
And feel grateful.
I got to spend a WHOLE HOUR with MY baby yesterday! What a blessing.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
Family Leave is NOT just a woman's issue!
So today is my very first day back to work without Maternity Leave. Sure, I've been working for 8-weeks now, but still... Just knowing that my leave is over... I'm getting teary just thinking about it. Leaving him this morning damn near broke my heart. Must remind myself: He is with his Daddy (and his Gramma since Daddy has a meeting to go to) and he is much loved and very well cared for. I got to feed him this morning and will give him a bath tonight. Its just not enough time. But I will make it count!
When DH requested to used his FMLA for the month of December and then to come back on a compressed scheudle (which other people in his office have) he recieved some static. They finally agreed, and pointed out that if he had been female, no one would have thought twice about his request. It would have practically been assumed! But we don't expect this from our men. Maybe if we did, then we would have better leave options. Working in domestic violence/se.xual assualt for years, I learned that if something was labeled a 'woman's issue' then it was often ignored by politicians and people with money. It was a 'soft' issue. If we focused more on the importance of family in this country, and equal parenting vs. the SAHM/working Dad mentality then maybe more may be done. Instead, we stick to the 1950's as our parenting ideal, have TV shows highlighting the plight of SUPER large families, and discuss at length teenage/single parents which are mostly focused on women. There is no easy solution. I'm not even sure where I'm going with this. I guess... I guess I would just like to feel supported as a working mother OUTSIDE my own support system. I wish my job, my government would get on board.
I did FINALLY find a support group for working mothers on BaltimoreMommies. Only 1 event so far, but it was AWESOME! One mommy talked about how she only gets to play with her son for about 30 min a day before getting him ready for bed (my issue!) and how she takes a day off a month to just stay home with him. I'm totally going to do that. I think that is a fantastic idea.
4 month doctor appt is wednesday! I'll post the update then.
When DH requested to used his FMLA for the month of December and then to come back on a compressed scheudle (which other people in his office have) he recieved some static. They finally agreed, and pointed out that if he had been female, no one would have thought twice about his request. It would have practically been assumed! But we don't expect this from our men. Maybe if we did, then we would have better leave options. Working in domestic violence/se.xual assualt for years, I learned that if something was labeled a 'woman's issue' then it was often ignored by politicians and people with money. It was a 'soft' issue. If we focused more on the importance of family in this country, and equal parenting vs. the SAHM/working Dad mentality then maybe more may be done. Instead, we stick to the 1950's as our parenting ideal, have TV shows highlighting the plight of SUPER large families, and discuss at length teenage/single parents which are mostly focused on women. There is no easy solution. I'm not even sure where I'm going with this. I guess... I guess I would just like to feel supported as a working mother OUTSIDE my own support system. I wish my job, my government would get on board.
I did FINALLY find a support group for working mothers on BaltimoreMommies. Only 1 event so far, but it was AWESOME! One mommy talked about how she only gets to play with her son for about 30 min a day before getting him ready for bed (my issue!) and how she takes a day off a month to just stay home with him. I'm totally going to do that. I think that is a fantastic idea.
4 month doctor appt is wednesday! I'll post the update then.
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