Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Memorial Day

I love LOVE a three day weekend!

First, on a different note, DH talked to one of his friends who has a due date 1 month after ours. They decided that our babies will be best friends, and realized we both have the same problem. We both have 4 days a week covered and 1 day up in the air. We figured it could work out very well for us if we exchange our day. This could work out great! Of course, I would rather be home with the baby, but it can help us get through the gap.

Okay, now back to the weekend...

Friday we went to DH's home and visited with his sister and bro-in-law. Nice, easy visit except apparently the three of them are sports junkies, and feel absolutly convinced that you MUST have a child in sports before they are in school. Seriously? My parents NEVER put me in something that I didn't choose, but they are deciding what their kid should participate in. I'm not really sure he even likes sports. Personally, I HATED sports. Why aren't they pushing him into an art class, or a music class? Or just keep exposing him to stuff, and then let him choose. Apparently DH is set on his kid being in sports. I see some problems in our future. Our one saving grace in this is that we have no money to do this stuff with. The other saving grace is that DH talks a good game, but much of the activity of getting something done falls on me. And if I don't really care about it, it doesn't get done. So we shall see...

After this lively discussion, I totally had to go to bed. The problem was the guest bed was so fricking hard that I had the WORST time sleeping. Made even worse by the sounds of a 6 year old knocking on the door and trying to break into the bedroom at 5:55am. Ugh! By 8:30am we were up and going to his baseball game. It was SO hot and SO boring. I mean, it could have been worse in both areas, but it was 80+ outside with no shade, and they pitch until the kid hits the ball, so the game doesn't really move. They don't keep score, there is no competition, they don't really teach the fundementals of hitting, just of fielding, which no one gets to practice because they are waiting around for a kid to FINALLY get a hit. Afterwards we went back to sister's house, and had a nice lunch while the kids ran around and squirted each other. DH totally jumped in the fun, but I was so hot and so tired which = SO CRANKY. We went in to the hot hot house and I laid down on the couch while everyone else went to do something for themselves. Just me and the nephew. I just wanted to drift off but he would see that my eyes were closed and would wake me up!! I know he jsut wanted to spend time with me and would have been happy to play with me but I was SO hot and SO tired. Finally DH came down and I was free to go and get a nap. When it was time to get up, nephew came in to wake me. I told DH he set a boy to do a man's job, and DH said he never sent him in! The little stinker!

We went to a BBQ that night at a friend's house and it was fun. Everyone who had babies last year (remember those 4 that totally depressed me?) brought their babies with them. It definetly creates a different kind of party! They were all so cute! I was in MUCH better spirits this time around that I was pregnant.

Sunday we hung out with the MIL, and then went to my parents house for their BBQ. And Sunday night I had a minor breakdown because I was so fat and so hot and so unhappy and I forgot things at my mom's house, etc etc. But the next day I felt SOOO much better. I just really needed a good nights sleep.

Monday my mom came over to help plant and weed my gardens for me (since the neighborhood cats like to pee in them.) and then I started organizing the office. Got a lot done and have a LOT to go! But at least I started.

And now on to a 4 day work week with a free Saturday to look forward to. I'm thinking if I don't go to the gym I can get more done at home. BUT if I don't go to the gym I'll get even fatter. Its a lose lose situation I'm afraid.

And I wouldn't change it for anything...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

What to do?

So I met with my boss yesterday and finally got up the nerve to ask if I could work 4 10-hour days. I presented the benefits to the office, and how there would be no harm and got a "don't get your hopes up" response. He will talk to the VP and AVP and OHR to see what their thoughts are and I can only hope he makes a convincing argument. All I know, is that if he doesn't, and my request is denied, then I am royally screwed. My mom is generously arranging her schedule to cover 3 days a week, and hubby is arranging his schedule to cover 1 day a week, and I just don't know what to do for that other day. We could afford a babysitter at $8 an hour for one day a week, but who in their right mind would do that? Heck, even the local labour center for undocumented workers charges $10! We can't afford $10!

I ran the numbers:

Our bills (Mortgage - 1295, BGE - 200, Student loans - 530, credit card - 200, fica payback - 100, car payment - 350, insurance - 220, cell phone - 70, water bill - 25)
total: 2992 (keeping in mind that the mortgage will go up around the same time the credit card and fica are paid off.)

Bills that can be cut (ezpass - 45, gym - 50, verizon - 183)
total: 278

Food (817)
& Gas (120)

This is a total of 4207 a month for just the two of us, and not including savings, or medical expenses, or vet bills or any of that.

Each month our combined income is 4487 on average. that means we have 280 to use for everything else. That would barely cover a sitter at 8 an hour for one day a week as long as nothing else changes.

oh it makes my stomach hurt. I mean, right now we're not doing too bad. We manage to save a little each month (about 200) and we both contribute to 401Ks pretax. I can probally sign up for a flex spending plan to cover the bbsitter pretax.

Hubby was super pissed when I told him that I probally won't be able to get a flexible schedule. I mean, in this day and age of work/life balance, it really sucks when a college won't allow their employee to arrange their schedule differently. And I can't look for a job because I'm a wee bit knocked up right now, so I'm stuck. His thought is to just bring the baby to work with me. Ugh. I have no idea what to do...

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

First 'family' vacation

This weekend we went to Willamsburg for a nice little weekend away. It was me, DH, and my parents. We stayed in one of those timeshare thingies, so we had to sit through an absolutly fahbulous presentation, but in the end, the 90 minutes of torture were worth the awesome weekend. Besides how cool the town is, it was just fun hanging out with hubby, and spending time with my parents. Loved it. We took lots of pictures so we can show the baby that s/he was there. On a pregnancy related note... boy can I swell! My ankles and hands were crazy!Apparently bacon is not so good. Neither is heat and humidity. But swimming...swimming is AWESOME! Totally took the swelling down. And it felt so good. Baby kicked like crazy the whole weekend, especially during the loooonnnnggg car ride. Yay baby!

Today at work I got my first baby shower! It was so nice and such an awesome surprise. At one point I started freaking out because this is all becoming so real. I mean, for the longest time, the focus was on getting pregnant, then staying pregnant, then being pregnant... and in 3 months it will end and I'll have a baby! That is so surreal. I need to really get cracking at getting stuff done! I mean, I now have about 10 onesies, but I need 20 something of them in different sizes!! Babys need so much stuff! And wow, is it getting expensive! And that's with collecting giveaways from friends. I think we are about to have too much furniture, and still need a stroller, but should be good in many ways. Once we have the nursery put together then we can begin filling it. But wow, time is flying!

I signed up for childbirth classes today. The next few months are going to be FULL of stuff after work. I'm already starting to feel like a parent....

So a happy belated mother's day to all of us. Even if we don't have a child yet, it doesn't mean we are less of a mother. Going through IF and hitting mother's day would always make me sad, but I would choose to celebrate the nurturing energy within me, and the mother that someday I would be.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Feeling Blessed...

And in pain. But mostly blessed.

Yesterday I would have moments of panic, about losing the baby. Luckily, at week 27th there is a good chance that even if we needed to birth the baby now, it would survive. But then you think about the umbillical cord around its neck, trauma to the uterus, bizarre medical issues, etc.

So I google the odds of a healthy baby, and guess what? The odds of this kid growing up and outliving me are TOTALLY in my favor.

But then I go to an awards ceremony last night, and someone wants to get past me (even though there were LOTS of places to sit where she doesn't need to crawl over an obviously pregnant woman) and not thinking I pick up my legs, and pull them into my chest. I should have just slid my legs to the side, but noooo.... I had to go thinking that I was all skinny and stuff. And that's when the cramping happened. Now I don't know if it was contractions, or growing pains or what, but it felt a lot like menstual cramps that would come... and go.... and come....and come..... and go... I didn't like it one bit so I went home, took a shower, and focused my mind on something else while resting on the couch. Then I went to bed early. I'm feeling much better today and baby is bouncing around.

Of course, I'm running on little sleep thanks to the incredible pain in my hips and calf all night long. I just can't get comfortable! And the thunderstorm didn't help much either. Yoga is tonight and that normally makes me feel so much better. And tommorrow we go on vacation to Williamsburg. Yay!

But about the feeling blessed. I was reading a post on a blog about an older mother trying to concieve and just lost their baby. And all I can think is, thank you G-d. We were able to concieve 'naturally' (well, following surgery), and have had a healthy pregnancy so far. (knock on wood) I'm so scared about losing this baby because I love it so much. And I've been so scared to get ready for the baby because I'm so scared of jynxing myself. It still all feels too good to be true! I'm really getting excited about giving my baby a big hug and a kiss, and can't wait for the crazy upsidedownedness of being a new mom.

In yoga, we do this meditation where we are breathing out healing energy to all the moms giving birth. Secretly, I choose to channel my healing energy to all the moms that have yet to concieve and carry to term. I think they need it more.