To lose weight!
I'm a person that likes seeing progress... and I'm also a horrific procrastinator. These things often work against each other. I am slowly slipping into a 'nesting' phase (I think) because I've gotten quite good at getting things done at home. The problem is I've also gotten busy with the summer plans which limits my time to get stuff done. So here is my schedule:
Tonight - Buy food, cook dinner. Clean radiator and tape tarp.
Friday - Buy food, cook dinner. Spray paint radiator. Choose paint color. Make shopping list for home improvement store.
Saturday - Prep bathroom for painting. Buy paint. By 2pm go to Grandfather's day celebration. (which I think may be a baby shower...) Take Dad out to movies.
Sunday - Family power day!!
On Sunday, my parents are coming over to help get stuff done around the house. What I hope to accomplish:
Paint Bathroom (mom)
Sew bathroom curtains (me)
Finish dining room curtains (me)
Finish nursery curtains (me)
Paint and install quarter round molding (Dad & DH)
Pain and install crown molding around closets in nursery (Dad & DH). We have these Ikea closets that I'd like to make look like built-ins which I think can be accomplished with crown molding. We will have to see.
Purchase needed stuff at the local home improvement store (storage bins, light blocking shades, etc.)
Rearrange furniture.
Fix drawers in dresser (this may be a fantasy)
Hang pictures (in nursery and other rooms.)
Hang shades/curtains.
Hang clothesline.
I think that may be enough for one day. Then I'll make a nice dinner (or get some nice takeout) for all involved.
During the week, I want to make the faux stained glass panels for the living room, and try to get my grandfather to frame them for me. Once they are done, my mom can come over and help design carpets for the downstairs. Hopefully, we can get them installed before the baby comes.
The next weekend, we will be in PA all weekend and attending an infant care class. After that it is the 4th of July where we may or may not have overnight guests. If we do, then they will be able to help us finish up the nursery. Then I get to purchase and pack my hospital supplies, just in case.
After that, I think it may just be laundry and keeping the hosue clean. I want to go to 'Let's Dish' and make some meals to freeze for when the baby comes. Meanwhile, at work, I'll be finishing up the fall events.
I'm starting to feel a little bit stressed.
What if the baby comes early? I'll be so unprepared!
But meanwhile, I'm looking forward to being able to start working on my body; to get back into pants with zippers. I hope my feet go back so I don't have to buy new shoes. I'd rather put the money towards the baby.
Also, if this weekend ISN'T my shower, then 4th of July I'll be hitting the stores. Screw this whole "wait and see" stuff. If it is my shower then I'm going to feel kinda bad because I suspect. Really, for no other reason then I would have no idea when else they would do it!
Life is getting awfully complicated...
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Last Baby-Free Vacation
This past weekend was my 10-year college reunion... and it was more wonderful than I ever thought possible!
Friday: Drove up to UofS, checked into hotel, and went to one of our old haunts for some amazing pizza. Then we walked around a little, visiting the porch of my DH's house where we met. Afterwards, we went to the 'piano bar' event in the new student center. On walking into the building I totally recognized someone!! And she recognized me too! Crazy. We kept snowballing into more people until we had this awesome group of 1999-ers together. And so many baby bellies! If I was still dealing with IF at the reunion it would have kinda sucked. I do wish I could have taken the belly off for the weekend because there were open bars EVERYWHERE! Oh well. I think I would have had less fun ultimately if I had been able to drink since I would have been miserably hung over all weekend. Anyhoo, that night, after the piano bar in the new student center we went to a bar where a band that was made up of people from our class was having a reunion show. Of course the bar we went to used to be a little hole in the wall with the best cheese fries, and now it was an actual BAR! There we ran into even more people and I saw some guys I used to know. I didn't really feel like talking to them since I was no longer all young and hot. And we weren't very good friends anyway. I did see a flash of recognizition in some of their eyes, and that was good. But we didn't stay long because I was so tired and got back to the hotel by midnight where I promptly passed out.
Saturday: Grabbed a bite to eat and then hit the campus tour. So much has changed!! After the 'offical'tour, DH and I took our own, seeing the sites that we wanted to see and took pictures. Oh, and went to the bookstore and bought shirts for the two of us and a onesie for the baby. Then we went to the resturaunt where we had our first 'date' 10 years ago. It was fantastic. Just tooling around downtown, eatting ice cream and marveling about the changes in the city. That night we went to our class dinner and had a great time. I got lots of pictures of people, and really had a good time. Once we got past the 'so, what have you been up to' convo's we were able to talk just like old friends. That night there was a dance on the patio, which was a blast, though challenging to dance with the big ole belly. Then we went to the bar that we used to frequent 'back in the day'. My goodness it was hot and crowded!! I couldn't stand it!! And the smoking! Ugh! People kept bumping into me and the belly and I just couldn't take it. DH noticed it and so we quickly left. I'm glad I went though.
Sunday: We went to mass at the campus chapel and I forgot how AWEOMSE it was! I mean, the whole thing took 40 mins. That is half of what a service is at our current church. Afterwards, we went to brunch with our friends and had some last memories, and exchanged info. So nice. Really, I'm so glad I went.
Monday: After walking up hills all weekend, I knew I had no excuse to not do things around the house. LOL, DH had to actually keep one hand behind my back to help push me up the hills, but still, I did it. So I cleaned the whole house. It. looks. AWESOME! This weekend my parents are coming over to help with some last minute projects, and I have a lot of prep to do to get ready for that, but at least the house is clean. At the end of this weekend we should be in a really good place, and will just have to finish getting the nursery together, which should happen over the fourth of July. By July 8th, I want to be ready for the baby to come. I'll be 36 weeks, and ready to relax. Well, except for work. I won't be done with that until July 24th. So if I go early then they are screwed! By July 27th (after the weekend) I'll be in a good place to just start 'helping' at work and not taking point on anything. The fall semester is going to kinda be a wash since it will be all about survival. In January, I'll hit the ground running with organizing the spring events and trying to be more purposeful with other parts of my job. OR job searching. Either or...
Friday: Drove up to UofS, checked into hotel, and went to one of our old haunts for some amazing pizza. Then we walked around a little, visiting the porch of my DH's house where we met. Afterwards, we went to the 'piano bar' event in the new student center. On walking into the building I totally recognized someone!! And she recognized me too! Crazy. We kept snowballing into more people until we had this awesome group of 1999-ers together. And so many baby bellies! If I was still dealing with IF at the reunion it would have kinda sucked. I do wish I could have taken the belly off for the weekend because there were open bars EVERYWHERE! Oh well. I think I would have had less fun ultimately if I had been able to drink since I would have been miserably hung over all weekend. Anyhoo, that night, after the piano bar in the new student center we went to a bar where a band that was made up of people from our class was having a reunion show. Of course the bar we went to used to be a little hole in the wall with the best cheese fries, and now it was an actual BAR! There we ran into even more people and I saw some guys I used to know. I didn't really feel like talking to them since I was no longer all young and hot. And we weren't very good friends anyway. I did see a flash of recognizition in some of their eyes, and that was good. But we didn't stay long because I was so tired and got back to the hotel by midnight where I promptly passed out.
Saturday: Grabbed a bite to eat and then hit the campus tour. So much has changed!! After the 'offical'tour, DH and I took our own, seeing the sites that we wanted to see and took pictures. Oh, and went to the bookstore and bought shirts for the two of us and a onesie for the baby. Then we went to the resturaunt where we had our first 'date' 10 years ago. It was fantastic. Just tooling around downtown, eatting ice cream and marveling about the changes in the city. That night we went to our class dinner and had a great time. I got lots of pictures of people, and really had a good time. Once we got past the 'so, what have you been up to' convo's we were able to talk just like old friends. That night there was a dance on the patio, which was a blast, though challenging to dance with the big ole belly. Then we went to the bar that we used to frequent 'back in the day'. My goodness it was hot and crowded!! I couldn't stand it!! And the smoking! Ugh! People kept bumping into me and the belly and I just couldn't take it. DH noticed it and so we quickly left. I'm glad I went though.
Sunday: We went to mass at the campus chapel and I forgot how AWEOMSE it was! I mean, the whole thing took 40 mins. That is half of what a service is at our current church. Afterwards, we went to brunch with our friends and had some last memories, and exchanged info. So nice. Really, I'm so glad I went.
Monday: After walking up hills all weekend, I knew I had no excuse to not do things around the house. LOL, DH had to actually keep one hand behind my back to help push me up the hills, but still, I did it. So I cleaned the whole house. It. looks. AWESOME! This weekend my parents are coming over to help with some last minute projects, and I have a lot of prep to do to get ready for that, but at least the house is clean. At the end of this weekend we should be in a really good place, and will just have to finish getting the nursery together, which should happen over the fourth of July. By July 8th, I want to be ready for the baby to come. I'll be 36 weeks, and ready to relax. Well, except for work. I won't be done with that until July 24th. So if I go early then they are screwed! By July 27th (after the weekend) I'll be in a good place to just start 'helping' at work and not taking point on anything. The fall semester is going to kinda be a wash since it will be all about survival. In January, I'll hit the ground running with organizing the spring events and trying to be more purposeful with other parts of my job. OR job searching. Either or...
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Fear
I am now almost 31 weeks and last night we had our first childbirth class. Kinda fun. VERY scary. But that's not the fear I'm writing about. I feel practically panicked that something is going to go wrong. Maybe its the inferile in me. I mean, you start out all, "Oh, TTC is going to be super fun! I can't wait to have a baby!" and then it turns into, "Not everyone gets a baby. Maybe I'll never get to be a mom." And I guess that's where I am now. Its so hard to feel safe that this is actually happening. Somehow I still don't feel like this is real, that I'm allowed to trust that all will work out. I mean, there are a bajillion people in the world, so obviously more babies survive, grow up and outlive their parents then don't. The odds are seriously in my favor! And my precious little one had been moving non-stop last night and this morning. I think the thunderstorm that freaked me out freaked him/her out. I just REALLY want to meet my baby. I want to know if it is a boy or girl. I want to dance with him/her in the kitchen. I want to be sleep deprived, and nurse my sleepy baby. I want to know how is kicking me like crazy. I'll do anything for a safe birth and a happy, healthy outcome.
I think this may be happening because I am so frickin tired. DH came to bed late, which woke me up to pee. And then the lightning...and the thunder... and the kicking... and then I have to come to this crappy ass job. And while I'm here, a coworker who isn't married, doesn't have kids was talking about how I could never get a compressed work schedule because if I did then she would want to have one too and they would have to offer it to her. Says who? I'm not trying to do this because I WANT to, but because I can't afford daycare! She wants to do it to have a vacation. So essentially, she will make things difficult so she can have an extra vacation day a week, selfishly taking away my oppertunity to parent my baby. I asked her does she seriously want to put in 11 hours a day? Seriously? It bothered me that my coworkers aren't supportive. I mean, I really want to work on a team, but I'm surrounded by people that are in it for themselves.
At least the rightgeous anger stops the panicky fear.
Oh, and PS! My cousin, young, unmarried, cousin accidentially got preggo with her boyfriend of <1 year. Seriously?! I'm so glad I'm pregnant and not still TTC because I think I would have LOST it. I still hate stories like that. What a crock. But, in the reality of it, DH and I want to help her because its hard thing to do. At least her parents are being super supportive!
I think this may be happening because I am so frickin tired. DH came to bed late, which woke me up to pee. And then the lightning...and the thunder... and the kicking... and then I have to come to this crappy ass job. And while I'm here, a coworker who isn't married, doesn't have kids was talking about how I could never get a compressed work schedule because if I did then she would want to have one too and they would have to offer it to her. Says who? I'm not trying to do this because I WANT to, but because I can't afford daycare! She wants to do it to have a vacation. So essentially, she will make things difficult so she can have an extra vacation day a week, selfishly taking away my oppertunity to parent my baby. I asked her does she seriously want to put in 11 hours a day? Seriously? It bothered me that my coworkers aren't supportive. I mean, I really want to work on a team, but I'm surrounded by people that are in it for themselves.
At least the rightgeous anger stops the panicky fear.
Oh, and PS! My cousin, young, unmarried, cousin accidentially got preggo with her boyfriend of <1 year. Seriously?! I'm so glad I'm pregnant and not still TTC because I think I would have LOST it. I still hate stories like that. What a crock. But, in the reality of it, DH and I want to help her because its hard thing to do. At least her parents are being super supportive!
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Memorial Day
I love LOVE a three day weekend!
First, on a different note, DH talked to one of his friends who has a due date 1 month after ours. They decided that our babies will be best friends, and realized we both have the same problem. We both have 4 days a week covered and 1 day up in the air. We figured it could work out very well for us if we exchange our day. This could work out great! Of course, I would rather be home with the baby, but it can help us get through the gap.
Okay, now back to the weekend...
Friday we went to DH's home and visited with his sister and bro-in-law. Nice, easy visit except apparently the three of them are sports junkies, and feel absolutly convinced that you MUST have a child in sports before they are in school. Seriously? My parents NEVER put me in something that I didn't choose, but they are deciding what their kid should participate in. I'm not really sure he even likes sports. Personally, I HATED sports. Why aren't they pushing him into an art class, or a music class? Or just keep exposing him to stuff, and then let him choose. Apparently DH is set on his kid being in sports. I see some problems in our future. Our one saving grace in this is that we have no money to do this stuff with. The other saving grace is that DH talks a good game, but much of the activity of getting something done falls on me. And if I don't really care about it, it doesn't get done. So we shall see...
After this lively discussion, I totally had to go to bed. The problem was the guest bed was so fricking hard that I had the WORST time sleeping. Made even worse by the sounds of a 6 year old knocking on the door and trying to break into the bedroom at 5:55am. Ugh! By 8:30am we were up and going to his baseball game. It was SO hot and SO boring. I mean, it could have been worse in both areas, but it was 80+ outside with no shade, and they pitch until the kid hits the ball, so the game doesn't really move. They don't keep score, there is no competition, they don't really teach the fundementals of hitting, just of fielding, which no one gets to practice because they are waiting around for a kid to FINALLY get a hit. Afterwards we went back to sister's house, and had a nice lunch while the kids ran around and squirted each other. DH totally jumped in the fun, but I was so hot and so tired which = SO CRANKY. We went in to the hot hot house and I laid down on the couch while everyone else went to do something for themselves. Just me and the nephew. I just wanted to drift off but he would see that my eyes were closed and would wake me up!! I know he jsut wanted to spend time with me and would have been happy to play with me but I was SO hot and SO tired. Finally DH came down and I was free to go and get a nap. When it was time to get up, nephew came in to wake me. I told DH he set a boy to do a man's job, and DH said he never sent him in! The little stinker!
We went to a BBQ that night at a friend's house and it was fun. Everyone who had babies last year (remember those 4 that totally depressed me?) brought their babies with them. It definetly creates a different kind of party! They were all so cute! I was in MUCH better spirits this time around that I was pregnant.
Sunday we hung out with the MIL, and then went to my parents house for their BBQ. And Sunday night I had a minor breakdown because I was so fat and so hot and so unhappy and I forgot things at my mom's house, etc etc. But the next day I felt SOOO much better. I just really needed a good nights sleep.
Monday my mom came over to help plant and weed my gardens for me (since the neighborhood cats like to pee in them.) and then I started organizing the office. Got a lot done and have a LOT to go! But at least I started.
And now on to a 4 day work week with a free Saturday to look forward to. I'm thinking if I don't go to the gym I can get more done at home. BUT if I don't go to the gym I'll get even fatter. Its a lose lose situation I'm afraid.
And I wouldn't change it for anything...
First, on a different note, DH talked to one of his friends who has a due date 1 month after ours. They decided that our babies will be best friends, and realized we both have the same problem. We both have 4 days a week covered and 1 day up in the air. We figured it could work out very well for us if we exchange our day. This could work out great! Of course, I would rather be home with the baby, but it can help us get through the gap.
Okay, now back to the weekend...
Friday we went to DH's home and visited with his sister and bro-in-law. Nice, easy visit except apparently the three of them are sports junkies, and feel absolutly convinced that you MUST have a child in sports before they are in school. Seriously? My parents NEVER put me in something that I didn't choose, but they are deciding what their kid should participate in. I'm not really sure he even likes sports. Personally, I HATED sports. Why aren't they pushing him into an art class, or a music class? Or just keep exposing him to stuff, and then let him choose. Apparently DH is set on his kid being in sports. I see some problems in our future. Our one saving grace in this is that we have no money to do this stuff with. The other saving grace is that DH talks a good game, but much of the activity of getting something done falls on me. And if I don't really care about it, it doesn't get done. So we shall see...
After this lively discussion, I totally had to go to bed. The problem was the guest bed was so fricking hard that I had the WORST time sleeping. Made even worse by the sounds of a 6 year old knocking on the door and trying to break into the bedroom at 5:55am. Ugh! By 8:30am we were up and going to his baseball game. It was SO hot and SO boring. I mean, it could have been worse in both areas, but it was 80+ outside with no shade, and they pitch until the kid hits the ball, so the game doesn't really move. They don't keep score, there is no competition, they don't really teach the fundementals of hitting, just of fielding, which no one gets to practice because they are waiting around for a kid to FINALLY get a hit. Afterwards we went back to sister's house, and had a nice lunch while the kids ran around and squirted each other. DH totally jumped in the fun, but I was so hot and so tired which = SO CRANKY. We went in to the hot hot house and I laid down on the couch while everyone else went to do something for themselves. Just me and the nephew. I just wanted to drift off but he would see that my eyes were closed and would wake me up!! I know he jsut wanted to spend time with me and would have been happy to play with me but I was SO hot and SO tired. Finally DH came down and I was free to go and get a nap. When it was time to get up, nephew came in to wake me. I told DH he set a boy to do a man's job, and DH said he never sent him in! The little stinker!
We went to a BBQ that night at a friend's house and it was fun. Everyone who had babies last year (remember those 4 that totally depressed me?) brought their babies with them. It definetly creates a different kind of party! They were all so cute! I was in MUCH better spirits this time around that I was pregnant.
Sunday we hung out with the MIL, and then went to my parents house for their BBQ. And Sunday night I had a minor breakdown because I was so fat and so hot and so unhappy and I forgot things at my mom's house, etc etc. But the next day I felt SOOO much better. I just really needed a good nights sleep.
Monday my mom came over to help plant and weed my gardens for me (since the neighborhood cats like to pee in them.) and then I started organizing the office. Got a lot done and have a LOT to go! But at least I started.
And now on to a 4 day work week with a free Saturday to look forward to. I'm thinking if I don't go to the gym I can get more done at home. BUT if I don't go to the gym I'll get even fatter. Its a lose lose situation I'm afraid.
And I wouldn't change it for anything...
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
What to do?
So I met with my boss yesterday and finally got up the nerve to ask if I could work 4 10-hour days. I presented the benefits to the office, and how there would be no harm and got a "don't get your hopes up" response. He will talk to the VP and AVP and OHR to see what their thoughts are and I can only hope he makes a convincing argument. All I know, is that if he doesn't, and my request is denied, then I am royally screwed. My mom is generously arranging her schedule to cover 3 days a week, and hubby is arranging his schedule to cover 1 day a week, and I just don't know what to do for that other day. We could afford a babysitter at $8 an hour for one day a week, but who in their right mind would do that? Heck, even the local labour center for undocumented workers charges $10! We can't afford $10!
I ran the numbers:
Our bills (Mortgage - 1295, BGE - 200, Student loans - 530, credit card - 200, fica payback - 100, car payment - 350, insurance - 220, cell phone - 70, water bill - 25)
total: 2992 (keeping in mind that the mortgage will go up around the same time the credit card and fica are paid off.)
Bills that can be cut (ezpass - 45, gym - 50, verizon - 183)
total: 278
Food (817)
& Gas (120)
This is a total of 4207 a month for just the two of us, and not including savings, or medical expenses, or vet bills or any of that.
Each month our combined income is 4487 on average. that means we have 280 to use for everything else. That would barely cover a sitter at 8 an hour for one day a week as long as nothing else changes.
oh it makes my stomach hurt. I mean, right now we're not doing too bad. We manage to save a little each month (about 200) and we both contribute to 401Ks pretax. I can probally sign up for a flex spending plan to cover the bbsitter pretax.
Hubby was super pissed when I told him that I probally won't be able to get a flexible schedule. I mean, in this day and age of work/life balance, it really sucks when a college won't allow their employee to arrange their schedule differently. And I can't look for a job because I'm a wee bit knocked up right now, so I'm stuck. His thought is to just bring the baby to work with me. Ugh. I have no idea what to do...
I ran the numbers:
Our bills (Mortgage - 1295, BGE - 200, Student loans - 530, credit card - 200, fica payback - 100, car payment - 350, insurance - 220, cell phone - 70, water bill - 25)
total: 2992 (keeping in mind that the mortgage will go up around the same time the credit card and fica are paid off.)
Bills that can be cut (ezpass - 45, gym - 50, verizon - 183)
total: 278
Food (817)
& Gas (120)
This is a total of 4207 a month for just the two of us, and not including savings, or medical expenses, or vet bills or any of that.
Each month our combined income is 4487 on average. that means we have 280 to use for everything else. That would barely cover a sitter at 8 an hour for one day a week as long as nothing else changes.
oh it makes my stomach hurt. I mean, right now we're not doing too bad. We manage to save a little each month (about 200) and we both contribute to 401Ks pretax. I can probally sign up for a flex spending plan to cover the bbsitter pretax.
Hubby was super pissed when I told him that I probally won't be able to get a flexible schedule. I mean, in this day and age of work/life balance, it really sucks when a college won't allow their employee to arrange their schedule differently. And I can't look for a job because I'm a wee bit knocked up right now, so I'm stuck. His thought is to just bring the baby to work with me. Ugh. I have no idea what to do...
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
First 'family' vacation
This weekend we went to Willamsburg for a nice little weekend away. It was me, DH, and my parents. We stayed in one of those timeshare thingies, so we had to sit through an absolutly fahbulous presentation, but in the end, the 90 minutes of torture were worth the awesome weekend. Besides how cool the town is, it was just fun hanging out with hubby, and spending time with my parents. Loved it. We took lots of pictures so we can show the baby that s/he was there. On a pregnancy related note... boy can I swell! My ankles and hands were crazy!Apparently bacon is not so good. Neither is heat and humidity. But swimming...swimming is AWESOME! Totally took the swelling down. And it felt so good. Baby kicked like crazy the whole weekend, especially during the loooonnnnggg car ride. Yay baby!
Today at work I got my first baby shower! It was so nice and such an awesome surprise. At one point I started freaking out because this is all becoming so real. I mean, for the longest time, the focus was on getting pregnant, then staying pregnant, then being pregnant... and in 3 months it will end and I'll have a baby! That is so surreal. I need to really get cracking at getting stuff done! I mean, I now have about 10 onesies, but I need 20 something of them in different sizes!! Babys need so much stuff! And wow, is it getting expensive! And that's with collecting giveaways from friends. I think we are about to have too much furniture, and still need a stroller, but should be good in many ways. Once we have the nursery put together then we can begin filling it. But wow, time is flying!
I signed up for childbirth classes today. The next few months are going to be FULL of stuff after work. I'm already starting to feel like a parent....
So a happy belated mother's day to all of us. Even if we don't have a child yet, it doesn't mean we are less of a mother. Going through IF and hitting mother's day would always make me sad, but I would choose to celebrate the nurturing energy within me, and the mother that someday I would be.
Today at work I got my first baby shower! It was so nice and such an awesome surprise. At one point I started freaking out because this is all becoming so real. I mean, for the longest time, the focus was on getting pregnant, then staying pregnant, then being pregnant... and in 3 months it will end and I'll have a baby! That is so surreal. I need to really get cracking at getting stuff done! I mean, I now have about 10 onesies, but I need 20 something of them in different sizes!! Babys need so much stuff! And wow, is it getting expensive! And that's with collecting giveaways from friends. I think we are about to have too much furniture, and still need a stroller, but should be good in many ways. Once we have the nursery put together then we can begin filling it. But wow, time is flying!
I signed up for childbirth classes today. The next few months are going to be FULL of stuff after work. I'm already starting to feel like a parent....
So a happy belated mother's day to all of us. Even if we don't have a child yet, it doesn't mean we are less of a mother. Going through IF and hitting mother's day would always make me sad, but I would choose to celebrate the nurturing energy within me, and the mother that someday I would be.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Feeling Blessed...
And in pain. But mostly blessed.
Yesterday I would have moments of panic, about losing the baby. Luckily, at week 27th there is a good chance that even if we needed to birth the baby now, it would survive. But then you think about the umbillical cord around its neck, trauma to the uterus, bizarre medical issues, etc.
So I google the odds of a healthy baby, and guess what? The odds of this kid growing up and outliving me are TOTALLY in my favor.
But then I go to an awards ceremony last night, and someone wants to get past me (even though there were LOTS of places to sit where she doesn't need to crawl over an obviously pregnant woman) and not thinking I pick up my legs, and pull them into my chest. I should have just slid my legs to the side, but noooo.... I had to go thinking that I was all skinny and stuff. And that's when the cramping happened. Now I don't know if it was contractions, or growing pains or what, but it felt a lot like menstual cramps that would come... and go.... and come....and come..... and go... I didn't like it one bit so I went home, took a shower, and focused my mind on something else while resting on the couch. Then I went to bed early. I'm feeling much better today and baby is bouncing around.
Of course, I'm running on little sleep thanks to the incredible pain in my hips and calf all night long. I just can't get comfortable! And the thunderstorm didn't help much either. Yoga is tonight and that normally makes me feel so much better. And tommorrow we go on vacation to Williamsburg. Yay!
But about the feeling blessed. I was reading a post on a blog about an older mother trying to concieve and just lost their baby. And all I can think is, thank you G-d. We were able to concieve 'naturally' (well, following surgery), and have had a healthy pregnancy so far. (knock on wood) I'm so scared about losing this baby because I love it so much. And I've been so scared to get ready for the baby because I'm so scared of jynxing myself. It still all feels too good to be true! I'm really getting excited about giving my baby a big hug and a kiss, and can't wait for the crazy upsidedownedness of being a new mom.
In yoga, we do this meditation where we are breathing out healing energy to all the moms giving birth. Secretly, I choose to channel my healing energy to all the moms that have yet to concieve and carry to term. I think they need it more.
Yesterday I would have moments of panic, about losing the baby. Luckily, at week 27th there is a good chance that even if we needed to birth the baby now, it would survive. But then you think about the umbillical cord around its neck, trauma to the uterus, bizarre medical issues, etc.
So I google the odds of a healthy baby, and guess what? The odds of this kid growing up and outliving me are TOTALLY in my favor.
But then I go to an awards ceremony last night, and someone wants to get past me (even though there were LOTS of places to sit where she doesn't need to crawl over an obviously pregnant woman) and not thinking I pick up my legs, and pull them into my chest. I should have just slid my legs to the side, but noooo.... I had to go thinking that I was all skinny and stuff. And that's when the cramping happened. Now I don't know if it was contractions, or growing pains or what, but it felt a lot like menstual cramps that would come... and go.... and come....and come..... and go... I didn't like it one bit so I went home, took a shower, and focused my mind on something else while resting on the couch. Then I went to bed early. I'm feeling much better today and baby is bouncing around.
Of course, I'm running on little sleep thanks to the incredible pain in my hips and calf all night long. I just can't get comfortable! And the thunderstorm didn't help much either. Yoga is tonight and that normally makes me feel so much better. And tommorrow we go on vacation to Williamsburg. Yay!
But about the feeling blessed. I was reading a post on a blog about an older mother trying to concieve and just lost their baby. And all I can think is, thank you G-d. We were able to concieve 'naturally' (well, following surgery), and have had a healthy pregnancy so far. (knock on wood) I'm so scared about losing this baby because I love it so much. And I've been so scared to get ready for the baby because I'm so scared of jynxing myself. It still all feels too good to be true! I'm really getting excited about giving my baby a big hug and a kiss, and can't wait for the crazy upsidedownedness of being a new mom.
In yoga, we do this meditation where we are breathing out healing energy to all the moms giving birth. Secretly, I choose to channel my healing energy to all the moms that have yet to concieve and carry to term. I think they need it more.
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